Meet the Trump snowflake: the ‘Broflake’

Image: ambar del moral/ mashable

Of all the moronic alt-right internet lingo, of which there are truly endless lessons, the word “snowflake” should be at the top of everyone’s list.

If you’ve been fortunate enough not to hear this term before, let me devastate it for you: snowflake is a derogatory term utilized against progressives deemed to be too soft on issues of national importance, including immigration and all girl Wonder Woman screenings. Following Trump’s election, the word spiked in popularity, so some liberals have started to fight back best available behavior they knew how: by popularise the term “broflake” instead.

In American political internet discourse, you’re either a snowflake or a broflake. Or you’re a smart person who’s deleted their Twitter account.

Broflakes share a little bit in common with their hated cousin, snowflake. Like snowflakes, broflakes are especially sensitive to issues of race, class and gender issues. They are, nonetheless, the inverse of the snowflake community demographically and are disproportionately likely to be white, male, and stirring prank videos on YouTube.

Instead of objection traditional strength hierarchies, they defend them. For all the oppressed straight lily-white male egg avatars in “the worlds”, they crave you to know they’re here for you.

Broflakes belong to a very dangerous subset of bro: more narcissistic than the typical bro and more sensitive to slights, but merely in an ego-centric President Trump various kinds of behavior. They may even be smarter than the average bro and they don’t mind letting everyone know it, by tweeting approximately 12 times per minute on Twitter.

There’s no easy route to spot a broflake or divide it from a traditional bro, but broflakes do have several common determining attributes I would nonetheless like to group into an actual taxonomic subset, thanks.

1. They’re soldiers in the struggle civil right leaders, actually against feminazi Ghostbusters a nd misandrist Wonder Women screenings.

2. Broflakes hate Colin Kaepernick. The player’s bended knees is very clearly a threat to national security/ Western civilisation/ their Sunday afternoon sports schedule.

Also, they’re better at football than him.

3. They’re defends of the voiceless, including Ann Coulter, Sean Hannity, and this really brave YouTube artist they know who made a groundbreaking Loretta Lynch mashup.

4. They, too, are panicked about the slow eroding of republic at the Wesleyan College campus newspaper.

Ideological diversity is facing a #genocide .. Can democracy live 17 -year-old drama majors from Westchester?

5. Broflakes consider safe rooms absurd and fascistic.

That being said, they do support Trump’s effort to jail meanie journalists from The Washington Post who pubbed “fake news” about the president’s bathrobe.

6. Half of their tweets start with the question, “Can you believe if the same thing was said about[ males/ white people/ straight people ]? “

7. They’re commanders in the fight to keep Tim Allen on ABC.

8. They’re not racists they’re “race realists” committed to the truth.

9. They often appear in the form of the “devil’s advocate.”

10. Though they live on the alt privilege, some do take up residence on the left. They are scared of Congresswoman Maxine Waters and the health risks boo-boos she knows how inflict.

9. To situate a broflake, you need to look no further than the wannabe screenplay novelist industry. It’s their spiritual home.

Image: screenshot/ vanityfair

To be fair, the term broflake is an invention of the internet and is hence, by its very etymology, riling. The acceleration at which its travelled in no way matches the evolution of its far dumber relative, the: snowflake.”

Perhaps liberals have been more resistant to employing the word because they have a much more eclectic and precise vocabulary make their own choices: including Nazis, fascists, MRAs and lily-white nationalists. Why call someone a broflake when you are able to legitimately draw a connection between them and actual Nazis?

More than anything, the left may may not be using “broflake” just as much the right applications “snowflake” because candidly, they DGAF. Even though battles between Trump and Clinton supporters predominated the internet in the two weeks after the elections, liberals and the left has essentially refocused their attention elsewhere in recent months.

Progressives are much more concerned about whether they’ll have healthcare in the morning or a planet in the afternoon than whether that egg avatar who told them they’re an MS-1 3 defender on Twitter is scientifically a broflake or not.

Even with all this, let’s hope #broflake doesn’t move any more viral than it already has. If there’s one thing liberals don’t have space for anymore it’s battling unemployed ding dongs on the internet who are capable of never, ever vote for their candidate. Anyone who’s called Milo Yiannopoulos a “victim of political correctness” isn’t was just about to knock on entrances for Elizabeth Warren in 2020. There’s no point in involving and, as I’ve recently learned, so much exhilaration in dropping out.

Calling trolls “broflakes” isn’t any more effective than labelling folks “snowflakes” although I do believe, in my heart of hearts, that it’s one million percentage funnier.

So let’s devote it a remainder, block the broflakes as soon as we ensure them and use real adjectives to describe the horrible people in our lives. Perhaps the working day we’ll ripen into an period where no one is snowflakes or broflakes or even hashtags, they’re all just regular annoying people, shouting about good-for-nothing on the internet.

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